So This is a Hangover. Not a fan.

At Dad’s place with a cup of his “Hangover Coffee.”

I’m not doing so hot on my first booze hangover.

The first mistake was to drink four beers an hour in response to the flashbacks. You fix that shit with BENADRYL, dammit!

The second was the Michelob. That stuff is terrible. Starts off promising and turns into Dr. Bronner’s Tea Tree Oil Castile Soap on the finish—you can brush your teeth with it but don’t drink it.

(Note: DON’T DO THIS. This entire thing is a cautionary tale.)

I vacated the place a day later and hung over. It’s my first alcohol hangover… And that is why I made the Third Mistake of being hung over: I drank a glass of plain water.

…The reason they give people coffee for hangovers in the movies isn’t because it’s going to sober up people sooner. It’s because water hits the stomach like ice gravel and it’s coming right back up. LITERALLY DRINK ANYTHING BUT PLAIN WATER. Dr. Bronner’s Tea Tree Oil Castile Soap would be a better experience.

Did you know that if you don’t eat the next day that hangover isn’t going away? Yeah, neither did I. That’s why the Hangover Coffee. I STILL haven’t eaten… Not counting the meclizine tablets.

Stuff retrieval is imminent. Not sure about money or anything yet… Dad has suggested a certain nausea remedy, since the coffees aren’t killing it. I’ll take it.

…it occurs to me that I’ve not explained. Soon. 

To the Heckler in the comments today…

​”If that triggered you then you must have a hard time leaving the house because it’s everywhere”
Yes. I do. 
It’s everywhere. 
Your flip, assumed-cutesy dismissal is right. 
It’s everywhere, and it took years of therapy, more than one trip to the loony bin, and a daily cocktail of drugs to help me even get out of the house. It, as you said is everywhere. 
Do you, o flippant one, have the right to know what precisely It is?  I think no. You’ve really enough today—Including an attempted game of oneupsmanship bordering on the “not-all” and “splaining” playbooks. 
Your input was unneeded and unhelpful. 
And you should do better.